Martha Beck describes the moment when a fully loaded, rumbling, roaring Boeing 747 lifts its nose from the runway and soars into the sky as endlessly phenomenal. Pure physics she says, and uses the metaphor to describe how when human beings learn to align ourselves at a body, heart, mind and spirit level, something equally phenomenal happens – we ‘fly’, because it’s pure physics. As I listened to her audio book ‘The way of integrity’ over and over, with my life in a tailspin, her words made more and more sense.
I had studied psychology as my second degree after the opportunities presented by a business studies degree left me feeling empty and uninspired. At the age of forty, I was still trying to find LIFE. And once I qualified, I certainly did enjoy the rush of being in the privileged position to assist others endure and hopefully overcome whatever pain and frustration they were experiencing. It was also clearly an attempt to make sense of the human condition, and heal from my own childhood wounds which several therapy sessions had already highlighted.
But what I had underappreciated in all my academic studies and subsequent practice was the massive and overwhelming effect of culture in clipping our wings and preventing human beings from going anywhere truly significant. Through Martha’s and other voices, it became increasingly apparent that after nearly 60 years of my own life and 3000 years of recent human history, we are all largely institutionalized. This basically means we are slaves to certain group norms and values that may have ensured our survival, but do not deliver real peace, freedom and joy. For these, we must look inward, and learn how to nurture our own natures.
The prostate cancer diagnosis in 2020 and recurring clinical depression were my body and mind’s way of telling me things simply had to change. And so, I was fortunate enough to create something of a cultural islet where I could remove myself from work, family and societal demands for a three-month sabbatical. My objective was clear – I needed to learn how to nurture my nature and live my own life instead of being a slave to culture.
I went on a transcendental meditation course, learnt to consciously breath, wrote morning pages, started taking cold showers and swims, and returned to therapy. The books I read all seemed to be showing me the same thing, that it was time to reassess what I had always thought was real. I left the church and redefined my understanding of life and death, good and evil. And most importantly, I took full responsibility for my life, equipped with certain ancient and largely forgotten tools to counter the effects of culture. The result has been my own awakening or lift off, because it’s pure physics! If you would like fly, please contact me, psychologist in Fourways.