John Powell, in his book ‘The Secret of Staying in Love’, suggests that the average human realizes only 10% of their potential. What a tragedy that so much living and loving is missing from our lives. Fortunately, we are at a point in history where this can and should change. In the past couple of years, I underwent a massive awakening, as my quest for abundant life took a dramatic turn. Prostate cancer in 2020 and recurring clinical depression highlighted how ‘cold’ I was, but they were also the catalyst for a radical shift, putting me ‘hot’ on the trail to sustainable peace, freedom, and joy.
I believe peace, freedom, and joy (PFJ) are natural phenomena, residing in all organic matter, including humans – a universal birth right. We should all die knowing we really lived and loved, but alas we mostly die having not. So, what is preventing us from realizing more than 10% of our potential? Quite simply, it’s a combination of two factors – our nature and our nurture. Our nature is extraordinary, born of millions of years of evolutionary history, making us the most advanced species on the planet. But we are also naturally the most dependent of creatures initially, relying upon a nurturing environment to help us unlock our inherited potential. And herein lies the problem. For a long time, our nurture has been the weakest link, lacking in understanding, substance, and efficacy, causing us to stumble.
The three pillars of modern civilization, ushered in between 260 and 3500 years ago, are organized religion, formal education, and nuclear family. Whilst the ideals of family, faith, and education are noble, if the premise of these ‘nurturing’ institutions is that our inherent natures are problematic, sinful, and controllable, then we are skating on thin ice. It was their role and responsibility to bring out our gold, liberating us into glorious freedom, but alas they’ve somehow colluded to do the opposite, stealing our peace, freedom, and joy. We have been caught up in an inter-generational cycle of cultural captivity. Neuroscience has revealed why our highly dependent natures are at the mercy of prevailing social norms and values. Our brains only fully integrate at the age of 25, so everything that takes place in our environment prior to this, largely determines where we find ourselves later in life. As the saying goes, “Garbage in, garbage out”.
The solution and the missing link, something that appears to have been off the table for a very long time, is to learn to nurture your nature. Through reestablishing a profound relationship with your ‘Self’, spending time aligning yourself at a body, heart, head, and soul level, you facilitate your own awakening. Of course, there may be some deeper earth moving equipment required to resurrect your heart from the rubble of institutionalized onslaughts. Please do not be ashamed of reaching out to a supportive health professional. But once you are able, I encourage you to become fully independent, and take back your life through conscious breathing, emotional regulation, ‘The Work’ (Byron Katie) of mental flexibility, and meditation.
I leave you with a quote by Marianne Williamson, from A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of ‘A Course in Miracles’, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually – who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”